As long as I can remember I’ve always loved travelling. Discovering new countries and towns, immersing myself in the local culture, whether that’s watching a flamenco show in Barcelona, Spain, snowboarding down the powdery slopes of Niseko, Japan or visiting an outdoor local art gallery in the busy streets of Lagos, Nigeria. There is something special and unique about every trip I’ve taken and one thing I noticed is my experiences were fairly influenced by the person or people I was travelling with. If there’s one thing I’ve learnt from all of these experiences is our individual travelling styles CANNOT be understated. It simply boils down to…are you a vacationer or a traveller? More on this for another blog post…
I am a traveler through and through and as much as I love to experience the world with loved ones, there will always be an element of compromise which I’m more than happy to make but something inside me was itching to break free. I had always had a passion for learning Spanish and Latin America for one reason or another beckoned to my spirit. No one in my circle felt this pull as much as I did and if I waited for others, I might never go so the thought occurred to me. Maybe I could do this alone? I’m not one to back down from a challenge no matter what perceived barriers I face, and so solo travelling seemed to be the perfect endeavour to mark the end of my midwifery training. Having now completed 8 weeks in South America I can now share my two pence! There are so many reasons, but I thought to keep this list concise and simple.
1. You will never have this time again
Now let me preface this with acknowledging that we are all on different paths in life and exceptions do exist. But for the most part, the older we get the more responsibilities we have and the less able bodied we feel. If you are at the beginning of your career, don’t have kids, need a break from the monotony of life or just want to have some cool stories to tell- this could be the best decision for you.
Is there an element of selfishness to solo travelling? Yes of course. Solo travelling revolves around what YOU want on YOUR terms. You are responsible for your experiences, your joy, your time and you will get what you want out of it. Want to spend 6 hours in a museum? Do it. Want to spend all day in your hotel room? Why not. Want to walk aimlessly through a town with no plans? Go for it. Now in my case, I have spent the last 22 years of my life in formal education and about to start my career as a registered midwife as well as embarking on completing my master’s degree. I am in a stable committed relationship, I don’t have a mortgage or a car, I have no children and I conveniently had the perfect window between the end of my training and my start date as a preceptee midwife to spend weeks or months if I wanted, to solo travel. Not everyone has the stars align for them perfectly in this way but the only other time I could see myself doing this is post-retirement when the kids have flown the nest- Yes, I will absolutely be that reckless travelling OAP that won’t sit down.
The possibilities and opportunities out there are endless and waiting for you to make that happen!
2. Find out your limits and capabilities
You may think you have a pretty good idea of who you are, your comfort levels, your limitations, your likes and dislikes and even your morals. Remember, your prefrontal cortex which is the region in the brain responsible for regulating our thoughts, actions and emotions doesn’t fully develop until 25! Even if you’re in your late 20’s like me, have you had the opportunity to challenge these fundamental characteristics you believe you possess? When you are alone in a foreign land there is a terrifying yet exhilarating realisation that you are responsible for your safety and wellbeing. Where other people might have been there to protect and stand up for you, you are now in the front seat taking charge and reckoning with what you are capable of.
Being in situations where it was only me in the way of asserting my preferences with pushy waiters or challenging myself to try sandboarding in the dunes and even bartering with aggressive sellers at the local market, I can boldly say I increased my confidence, established boundaries and even improved my self-esteem. Now don’t get me wrong, there are instances that absolutely affirmed assumed characteristics, but I can confidently claim these traits as I challenged them. My Spanish HAD to improve because I had no choice! The more I spoke and listened the better I got, I made (and still make) mistakes but I found I gained more confidence the more I tried- and I found I was able to build a better rapport with the locals as they could see the effort I was making, and I believe in my heart helped me to have more enjoyable experiences.
Going into this I thought I had a good understanding of what I could/would do and boundaries I have with people but being on the other side I have never felt more capable or more self-assured of who I am at this stage in my life.
3. Time to reflect on your life and the world
“I choose to be an active participant in my life and not a spectator”
I believe it can become easy (understandably) to become jaded with life over the years when you’re in the same environment, with the same people doing the same repetition year after year, burdened with responsibilities, not challenging yourself and becoming comfortable in the mundane that could make one question what the point of this is all for. Solo travelling could be a time out or reset in your life before getting to this aforementioned dreaded scenario. There is an element of anonymity you will experience that brings a sense of freedom to your life and being.
You’re taking a break from your routine of playing the part of friend, sibling, son/daughter, parent, colleague and exploring the potential of other parts of yourself. Self-discovery will happen consciously or subconsciously (although I recommend making mental or physical notes from time to time) and you will be so far removed from your everyday life you may begin to question things. For me, as a Christian I felt a greater depth of awe and gratitude for the wonders and beauty of the world and took time to appreciate things in my life I took for granted. I spent days in silence reflecting and other days out experiencing the world through the lens of local people and the systemic problems they face.
Overall, it gave me a broader perspective on what I wanted out of life and where I placed my priorities. In a lot of ways, I know myself more intimately and in others I know there’s a lot more to discover which greatly excites me. This is a sort of roundabout way of saying I learned to love myself more but also learned to love life more for all its ups and downs. I choose to be an active participant in my life and not a spectator.
And that’s it folks! With all that being said, solo travelling might not be for everyone, but you’ll never know that without trying. It doesn’t have to be for months on end, a week or even a weekend away could do the trick and you’ll feel a sense of achievement or at least knowing you did something for yourself. Take your travel plans into your own hands!
